You know that scene in the movie The Wedding Crashers? The one where Owen Wilson’s character John is talking to Rachel McAdams’s character Claire...I think they’re on a beach...anyways, and he says something about how he’s still young and he has time, blah, blah, blah, and Claire blasts him with reality and says, “Yeah, but you’re not that young.”
That is my life.
I realize he was probably playing a character in his 30s, approaching his 40s, but I think the sentiment is bang on. You can pretend you’re young all you want, but eventually it’s just going to seem silly.
Tom will be joining me soon...in the mid-to-late twenties club. But, as the current elder of this collab blog, I have to say...I’m scared, man. I’m scared of turning 30 in a few years. I’m scared of being alone and poor and unsatisfied with life. I’m scared of being perceived as someone trying too hard to be hip and trendy.
In Ontario, Canada, there are several milestone birthdays:
16 - You can legally learn to drive a car.
18 - You can vote, buy lottery tickets, purchase pornography, and buy cigarettes.
19 - You can legally drink and purchase alcohol, and gamble.
25 - You are officially a Quarter-of-a-Century Old
After this, aside from the big birthdays (30, 40, 50 and so on), ages just become signals - signals that you’re getting older.
Now, I’m not really one to get depressed over age - but I do freak out over society’s expectations of certain ages. By 30 you should have a career and a steady income and a white picket fence. By 40 you should own lake front property and a boat. By 50 you should play a lot of golf and attend many banquets. When you die you should leave a large fortune to your offspring. Ahhh!
Do you blame me for pretending it’s all not happening? Do you blame me for hanging out with people who are younger than me? Do you blame me for not wanting a conventional life? If I avoid the expectations attached to my age people will be shocked and surprised when they find out that I’m 26, going on 27.
So, I raise my virtual glass to you Tom! Welcome to the club! May you drown your fears in beers! Cheers! (I’m a champion of rhyming).
I hope you’re not too drunk to post on Wednesday buddy - this is your week to shine my British friend!
|*Picture from my 24th birthday, but let's pretend those are Tom and Lauren's hands, okay?|