Wednesday, 17 November 2010

I only play computer games sometimes. Honest.

The fact that this post is going to be so easy for me to write says something very important about the ways in which I choose to pass the time. Thinking about it, it would be a lot harder for me to think of something I like to do that's actually respectable, hip and down with the kids if you will, rather than a guilty pleasure (of which I have hundreds, it seems). Like Allison mentioned on Monday; now that I've left the mind-boggling gauntlet of judgement and prejudice that is school, I really couldn't care less about how my hobbies rate on the Scale of Cool. Dare I say that I've embraced geekdom? Yes, I've given in.

For the purpose of keeping this post a reasonable length, I'll choose my most embarrassing obsession; The Sims.

Yes - there's nothing I like more than guiding my virtual flock through the trials and tribulations of their simulated lives. I take good care of them, I do. They have fantastic clothes, great names, a dream house and never fail to succeed at whatever they choose to do [read: whatever I instruct them to do]. And therein, I think, lies the fascination for me. In their world I am all-powerful. A kind and just ruler of the universe they inhabit.

I could go further; not only do I revel in building a dynasty of stunningly successful, superbly named computerfolk, I also grow slightly envious of the carefree lives they lead.

Who wouldn't want a job that guarantees promotion if you work hard and keep people happy? Where boss' relatives and friends of friends don't start their careers with a built-in advantage. Who wouldn't kill for a real-life cheat that pops fifty grand into your bank account everytime you find yourself running low on funds? Or a button to press that will convince that faraway friend you never quite get round to calling that you honestly do still like them. This is how life show be, except, of course, that life should also be real.

I don't think I'm in any real danger of falling out of love with reality and finding myself unable to leave the glorious existence I've created for my sims. Real life is too much fun - at least it can be. But every now and then I wonder what it would be like never to have to make a decision, never to worry, never to fear the consequences of one's actions. And then I begin to wonder if I am, in fact, a tiny pawn in an incredibly complex version of the same game. And then I realise I've been up far too long and need to go to bed.

Or has my creator just right-clicked 'Sleep Until Fully Rested'?

Stop it Tom, seriously. And hang your head in your guilty pleasure shame.

Here I am with a selection of my guilty pleasures. Risha - please note fake Burberry scarf from my less sophisticated days. Everyone - please don't judge me too harshly.


  1. I'm trying really, really, really hard not to judge you for the Twatlight in the upper right corner.

    I love SIMS too. It lets me build some incredibly awesome worlds. A real life cheat code would be amazing. Maybe that's what that red car nonsense was about as a child- it was a cheat code!

  2. p.s: I just saw your caption! I squeed:
    b) Hahahahah, burberry scarf. You, (former) chav you. <3

  3. I love your photo! So fantastic!

    You should make TASG Sims! Seriously!

    I used to have Sims on my old computer - I used to play it for hours and hours. It's so addicting and you never know when to stop. I always found it a bit stressful, trying to make my people happy. They'd be making money, watching TV, eating food and making messes, but they'd be lonely...ahhh!

    I would ask about the Twilight thing, but since the TASG is a safe haven from ridicule I will say I am proud of you for posting this and the photo! Yay Tom!

  4. I love the Sims. Oh my God I love it so very much.

    I do wish I could enter cheats whenever I wanted. Boolprop the shit out of my day. Yes. I did just say that. I used to play it for hours; sadly my computer can't handle the new games so I'll have to sell them on, or get a new computer...just to play the Sims...

    I know what smart, smart choice I'll make.

  5. Firstly, I think I should explain the Twilight thing. Lauren, you're right, this is a safe haven, so don't worry - I feel unafraid, if completely ashamed, of telling you what happened.

    I read it. I read all four of them. Back to back. We all read it at work, and for two weeks after we finished, we loved it. Then a weird feeling hit us - we all felt dirty. The incredible shitness of what we'd just read dawned upon us. Honestly, it felt like a one-night stand. A good idea when you're completely drunk, a huge chasm of shame to fall into the day after.

    I can't believe we all have the Sims - is that not odd to anyone else? As far as I know, I'm the only person in Real Life who's ever played it.

  6. Allison! I meant Allison! I'm an idiot. And it was early in the morning - a lame, but I think valid, excuse.

  7. I don't play the Sims, and never have... from what I know about it.. I do think it's better than a game like World of Warcraft. But only because WoW has wizards and violence and stuff.
    So.. it's only a little odd to me that so many otherwise non-gamers have all played it.


  8. Gamers don't play SIMS. It takes a special kind of nerd to play SIMS. The totally awesome kind!

  9. I'm with ya on almost having more guilty pleasures than "respectable, hip and down with the kids" interests. I'm about the post the embarrassing list.

    And I've never read Twilight, but I have seen all the movies. 2 out of 3 were in theaters. One was at opening night. Judge me accordingly.