Where's Tom?

Hey all! I know some of you probably saw that Lauren posted her Halloween post yesterday - yay Lauren! But Tom is still M.I.A. - so this is what I, the Canuck, propose we do: Take another week off (if you didn't notice, no one posted last week - not even myself). We might have to change the format of this blog - maybe make it bi-weekly instead or something.

I know that the last email I got from Tom said he was really busy with work and that he had been staying at the office late every night. Hopefully he returns to the land of the living soon to grace us with his presence.

Not too much is new with me, trying to get all my Christmas ducks in a row and such.

Cheers,

Allison

Commercial Free!

I'm late, I'm late for a somewhat important date. I know, I'm never late - but I was giving Lauren a chance to finish her post from last week. That will hopefully still get posted soon as well.

We never confirmed this topic with each other, but I'm just gonna go with it:

IF MY LIFE WERE A TV SHOW

I'd say it would be a dramedy on HBO or Showtime. Episodes would follow the bizarre adventures of my character...let's call her Beth. Beth works at a coffee shop after getting laid off from her desk job at a magazine that eventually goes out of business. So the show would also tackle the subject of the changing economy and media. You'll laugh, you'll cry.

Other characters will include a best friend who lives in another town who you don't meet often, but you read chats and texts from her....let's call her Amber. And several co-workers at the coffee shop who act as a support group.

Other topics that would be touched on would be dysfunctional and long-distance relationships, anxiety issues, family drama, the crazy regulars of the coffee shop, and various other issues that come with the whole Quarter-life Crisis. She might even have a crazy stalker!

She also has a local pub that she meets a group of friends at each week to play trivia. I'd obviously have to work on making it a little more sexy...to fit with the HBO/Showtime style.

So that's my life on TV...tune in next week for another episode of The Transatlantic Support Group!

Stand by Us

Me enjoying a rugby match in Bath, UK.

So you guys have probably noticed that this blog is kinda lacking lately. Lacking Tom especially. I do hope that we return to our regular scheduled programming soon - but in the meantime please stick by us!

This week I say our topic be "My Busy Life."

Right now, my life isn't that busy. I work and when I'm not working I fill my time with other frivolous activities - such as, going to the pub. I'm also filling my time with catching up on all the shows I missed while I was in the UK. How I Met Your Mother, House, Modern Family, and Big Bang Theory. I live a full and interesting life.

Anyways, I know Tom and Lauren are quite busy right now - but hopefully you'll hear from them soon.

Sorry for the short and sweet post.

Cheers,

The Canuck

What the $%&#? (A Rant from The Canuck)

I got an email from the lovely lalalalauren yesterday with the topic for this week. Pet peeves! So while it’s fun to write posts about silly things, sometimes it’s good to get back to the nitty gritty of this blog and address things that seem more 20-something centric. Yes, everyone has pet peeves - all ages - but I feel like I can really talk about pet peeves that pertain to my particular station in life with this week’s post. Actually, this post will probably end up being pretty silly still.

So here we go!

One of my biggest annoyances is when people say they’ll do something but bail at the last second. Again, yes - I know this is a universal problem. But for me I feel like I wait around a lot for people. Maybe it’s just my personality, but I tend to believe people when they say they’ll do something at a certain time and most of the time I end up all dressed up with no where to go. What’s worse is that by the time you find out the plans are off it’s too late to do anything else. It’s super annoying. Just because I don’t have children or a boyfriend, husband or dog doesn’t mean my time isn’t valuable. Think about that next time you keep someone waiting only to cancel on them.

Another pet peeve of mine is ignorant drivers. I have a license...I’ve had a license for almost 10 years now - I know how to drive. I don’t, however, own a car. Because I don’t own a car I end up walking most places. I am a very law-abiding pedestrian and I very rarely jaywalk. I have almost been hit by cars at least ten times while I was making safe and legal crosses. Yes, I have headphones in my ears - but I’m not blind. Stop trying to run me down bitches!

This next annoyance is more job specific. I hate it when customers make stupid remarks to me when I’m behind the counter. “Oh, it’s a beautiful day, I bet you wish you didn’t have to work?”

No, I really wanted to work. I don’t enjoy sunshine...Ever.

Also, I hate it when customers take napkins and stuff them into mugs with liquid still in them. I know they think they’re helping, but it would have been more helpful if they just threw the napkins in the garbage. Now I have to reach in and pull the soggy napkin out or find a spoon or fork to get it out with. Thanks for making my job more disgusting.

While I’m ranting, I’ll just add anyone and everyone who treats me like I’m stupid because of my job. I have a four-year degree, but circumstances have not allowed me to better my situation right now. So just drink your coffee and bugger off.

People who blow smoke in my face. Just rude.

Job ads that say they are looking for someone with 2-5 years experience in a field. Can someone tell me how to get two years experience in a job when none of the job ads seem to ever say “entry level”?

Loud and ignorant people ranting loudly (and ignorantly) about how loud an ignorant someone else is. Look in the damn mirror!

Oh, and every celebrity who’s become famous for being a crazy asshole. I’m not even going to say his name because I don’t want people Googling him to stumble upon this. Also, the people who follow this “news” and think it’s great. We need to stop worshiping horrible people!

Another pet peeve of mine is girls who spend too much time thinking about guys. They dress for them, they do their hair for them, and just talk about how hot they are all the time. There is more to life than just boys and whether or not they want to bang you. Read a book sweetheart! (Sorry, that was mean).

I have some Facebook pet peeves. I hate it when people with babies or small children make their kid their profile picture. You are not your baby! Also, I don’t need to know that your baby has explosive diarrhea.

And attention “newly” weds...Your wedding was six months ago, change your picture.

I could go on and on...

I’m trying not to be an angry person, there’s just so many little things in my life that irk me!

Help, I need somebody. No, not just anybody...but Tom! I look forward to reading about your Pet Peeves on Wednesday (or Thursday...or Friday...or Saturday...)

P.S. If you're on 20-Something Bloggers and you love Tom, I nominated him for April's Blogger of the Month. He's currently trailing - so if you haven't voted maybe you should go over there and do so. Team Tom!

Also, if you're an artist/cartoonist I may have something I'm interested in having drawn in relation to this blog.

Skint, Brassic and Broke in Blighty

Sometimes I dream of a world without money, where one could barter with services, exchange goods and do favours for friends. In my mind, it's a beautiful place. Of course, if on Saturday I win the lottery I'll change my tune completely. The moment the money hit my account I'd be prancing round like Liza Minnelli in Cabaret: "Money makes the world go round, the world go round, the world go round..." It would not be a pretty picture. Besides my lack of it, my biggest issue with money is that I don't understand it. Gold standards, exchange rates, inflation; these are all things that go straight over my head.

And then there are The Markets. What are The Markets, exactly? And how do they manage to buffet the little people around according to their evil whim? I physically can't comprehend how something that must have at one time been created by mankind, now rules over it. I hold my hands up and admit the there's much I don't understand, and I don't want to sound like I'm rubbishing the economic systems I know nothing about, but this is the full extent of my knowledge on the subject.

I'm writing this on the tube as I speed (I mean trundle painfully slowly) beneath the City of London, where the streets are paved with gold and a banker's bonus would pay off my parents' mortgage. Where dreams are made and payout records are broken.

I've read a lot recently about how deregulation of the bankers led to the economic crash in 2009 and, in a way, I sympathise with them. Perhaps, if when I first started on a regular salary I had saved some money, or at least budgeted, I would not be in the dire economic straits I am in today. But I was young, irresponsible and - as already demonstrated - completely and utterly financially naive. How could I say no when the bank offered to increase my overdraft? I thought it was free money. And when they sent me a credit card - the one that screamed USE ME every time I opened my wallet, how was I to resist? Other people did and do manage to resist though - and I envy their intelligence. I don't want to blame anyone but myself, but somewhere along the line I failed to grasp the true value of the coins in my pocket and the numbers on my bank statements. And, as with the banks, there was nobody there to regulate my epic spending levels.

Unfortunately, the taxpayer steadfastly refuses to bail me out; yet even so I am clawing my way slowly, but steadily, back into the black. It was a lesson I needed to learn, and part of me is pleased I went about learning it the hard way. I was ill-equipped to make any sort of financial decision and while I still don't understand the bigger economic picture, at least I've finally figured out my own.

Funnily enough, when I held my wallet upside down for the photo above, I found £1.46 I didn't know I had, and €0.20. So thanks TASG, for coming to my aid yet again!

Next instalment: Lauren vs The Dollar Bill

This Title is Witty

Welcome to the future! It's 2011! The TASG is still here for you! Hope you all had fun New Year's Eve's and if not, are you really surprised? Is it ever as fun as you think it will be?

One of my regular customers, a cute snowboarder/graphic designer, came in on Saturday - he was haggard and hungover and looking for coffee. When I asked if it was a fun party he said, "it was all right - but it's never the New Year's you imagine for yourself." I couldn't agree more! I gave him some water and wished him a happy and healthy 2011.

As for me, I went to a party - I wore a pretty dress and did my hair and put on lipstick...and stood in someone's dirty kitchen and drank out of a red plastic cup. This was not the New Year's Eve I dreamt of. I felt overdressed and a bit old for the crowd.

New Year's Eve!

Anyways, this week isn't about drunken (or not, in my case) New Year's Eve stories - this week is about the future. This week the Transatlantic Support Group wants to kick the year off right by talking about what we each want for ourselves in 2011!

I try not to make resolutions - I feel like doing so makes me feel like I'm breaking my own heart repeatedly. Yeah, I'd love to lose 15 pounds, I'd love to get a "real" job and move into my own place - but those things aren't guaranteed and I hate making promises I can't keep.

There are a few things I'd like to do this year and I hope I can!

1) Travel to the UK to visit my cousin and his wife.

They recently moved to Bath from London, and I love Bath (I visited there briefly in 2003 when I travelled with my family). I'd like to go alone this time - it would be an adventure and a trip I'd never forget or regret. I might go further into debt for it, but it might be worth it. While I'm still young, right?

2) Get that second tattoo I've been meaning to get.

Showing off the shoes again, plus my first tattoo!

I've been talking about a second tattoo for a while now, and I think I'd like to finally commit to that. I know what I want, it's just a matter of deciding when. I'm thinking early Spring.

3) Run another 5K run (possibly more).

I'm definitely going to do Terry Fox again, but maybe I'll do a road race this year too. I'd like to push myself and try to do a more competitive run. I'm not a great runner, but it's something I'd like to strive for.

4) Take better care of myself.

I get stressed out way too easily and I need to start controlling my emotions. I need to also get over my fear of doctors.

5) Write more.

This could mean journaling, blogging, or just my own personal writing that I may or may not share with anyone. My point is that I would like to try to exercise my creativity a bit more, even if it's just for me.

Anyways, I can't think of any more things to share - who knows what will happen in 2011! I wish you all the very best!

Love you! You all get the midnight kiss I never got!

Happy New Year Tom - can't wait to hear about your hopes & dreams for the year!

Also, I've said this before - but if there are any topics you think we should cover?

Fears, Beers, and Cheers!

In honour of Tom’s Birthday this week he has suggested the topic of “Growing Older.” This is a really common issue with 20-somethings, as we finally start thinking about how we won’t always be in our 20s...and that REAL adulthood is creeping up on us fast.

You know that scene in the movie The Wedding Crashers? The one where Owen Wilson’s character John is talking to Rachel McAdams’s character Claire...I think they’re on a beach...anyways, and he says something about how he’s still young and he has time, blah, blah, blah, and Claire blasts him with reality and says, “Yeah, but you’re not that young.”

That is my life.

I realize he was probably playing a character in his 30s, approaching his 40s, but I think the sentiment is bang on. You can pretend you’re young all you want, but eventually it’s just going to seem silly.

Tom will be joining me soon...in the mid-to-late twenties club. But, as the current elder of this collab blog, I have to say...I’m scared, man. I’m scared of turning 30 in a few years. I’m scared of being alone and poor and unsatisfied with life. I’m scared of being perceived as someone trying too hard to be hip and trendy.

In Ontario, Canada, there are several milestone birthdays:

16 - You can legally learn to drive a car.
18 - You can vote, buy lottery tickets, purchase pornography, and buy cigarettes.
19 - You can legally drink and purchase alcohol, and gamble.
25 - You are officially a Quarter-of-a-Century Old

After this, aside from the big birthdays (30, 40, 50 and so on), ages just become signals - signals that you’re getting older.

Now, I’m not really one to get depressed over age - but I do freak out over society’s expectations of certain ages. By 30 you should have a career and a steady income and a white picket fence. By 40 you should own lake front property and a boat. By 50 you should play a lot of golf and attend many banquets. When you die you should leave a large fortune to your offspring. Ahhh!

Do you blame me for pretending it’s all not happening? Do you blame me for hanging out with people who are younger than me? Do you blame me for not wanting a conventional life? If I avoid the expectations attached to my age people will be shocked and surprised when they find out that I’m 26, going on 27.

So, I raise my virtual glass to you Tom! Welcome to the club! May you drown your fears in beers! Cheers! (I’m a champion of rhyming).

I hope you’re not too drunk to post on Wednesday buddy - this is your week to shine my British friend!

Happy Birthday!

*Picture from my 24th birthday, but let's pretend those are Tom and Lauren's hands, okay?

I Miss My Old Life (Sometimes)

It’s Monday! That means a new week and a new theme for the TASG. This week we’re all writing about friendships and current social lives.

I had this list planned, with categories and possibly a chart, but I've decided to just write...you know, from the heart and stuff.

On Monday nights I sit in a cozy English pub with friends and acquaintances and play trivia. This is something I did a bit of in the my early 20s, but life changes and new social opportunities replaced this ritual for awhile, but now I’m back at it.

I sit with people I used to consider close friends, but I walked away - I hid in different bars and pubs, met new people, tried new things. But sometimes sitting with these people just feels right.

I miss my old life sometimes.

I am good at being friends with boys. I was one of the guys, or at least that’s what I started out as. And I’ve since realized that being one of the guys was my favourite social role. No sexual implications, just friendship of the plutonic sort! I messed with this delicate system that worked so well for so long, and I had to back off. But, now I’ve been replaced by other girls - other girls who are one of the guys. And while I try to reminisce about old times, I can’t help but feel like I’m using a visitors pass for a club I used to be a member of. I miss that certainty. The certainty that I would have something fun to do most days of the week.

Now, all my friends are scattered. Some are in serious, long-term relationships that take precedent over friends (especially single friends). Some have moved for work. Some have a new group of friends as well. Some are still in school and busy with that. Some work all the time. And some are willing to let me play trivia with them on Monday nights at the pub.

I have my friends I met through work - and I’m grateful for them. Without that in my life I’d surely go mad from boredom. However, I do sometimes feel old when hanging out with that group. I’m the oldest (at least of the girls) and sometimes I feel like I’m just re-doing my early 20s because I spent mine being stressed over school. I never partied really - so I feel like I’m making up for that. But somedays it feels like I’m trying too hard to fit in with them kids!

God, I miss my old life sometimes.

So when I’m at the pub, on Monday nights, I feel better because I’m with my peers. I’m with people I went to high school with. I’m with people my age. I’m with people who don’t think I’m old. But it can’t be like how it was years ago. We've all grown up. We've all changed.

My social life is a mixed bag of things. I chat with my out-of-town friends online and through Facebook and texts. I try to plan and organize gatherings and events. I invite people to movies, concerts, shows, nights out on the town. Sometimes they come, sometimes they don’t. Sometime I put my pajamas on at 9 P.M. on a Saturday night and watch TV on DVD till my eyes cross.

So, while I have a few life-long friends, it doesn’t mean my calendar is full all the time. And you know what? That's fine with me.

Tune in Wednesday for my internet friend Tom’s take on friends and social gatherings!

And come back Friday (or Saturday...or Sunday) to read Lauren's!

We've actually got the whole month of December planned for this blog - which is rare for us, as we usually plan our themes last minute. Also, if there are any topics you'd like to suggest, please leave them in the comments!

Ground, Swallow Me Up. ASAP.

I'm no stranger to an awkward situation, which is largely my fault. I have an uncanny knack of making even the most simple conversations problematic - a problem which is exemplified if I have to queue before said social interaction takes place.

Take a recent trip to the cinema, for example. When asked if I'd prefer cheese or salsa with my nachos, I replied;

"Erm...God. Erm...well cheese. No salsa. Erm wow. Decision. Salsa. Go with salsa. NO, CHEESE!"

I had salsa, in the end, and I could sense the girl behind the counter thought I was a complete twonk. Little did she know, there was more to come! Yes, the idiot only went and asked me if I wanted a receipt. You'd think, judging by my less than skilful handling of the above conversation, that she'd avoid any more questions that required a decision being made. But she didn't - she went there anyway - and so we were both stuck in an infuriating loop while I to'd and fro'd between having a receipt or leaving without one. I took the receipt, and threw it in the bin outside.

Suffice it to say, I now go to a different cinema; although this hasn't solved my problem. Wherever I may go, whatever decision I may be expected to make, I can make it awkward and unecessarily difficult. As I was leaving a music festival two years ago with N and my brother, a steward asked if we were on our way home.

N said yes. Ever honest and polite.

My brother said no. Deceit is his problem, I think.

I stopped dead in my tracks, like a rabbit caught in headlights and stared back like she'd asked me to solve a complex riddle.

But anyway, this post should be about awkward situations I've found myself in - of which there are many. There's one I've blogged about before. I'd had too much to drink, and fallen over on the dance floor of a club. A bouncer came over and asked me to step outside (in other words: call a cab, you're going home). On the way off the dance floor, however, I grabbed his hand, and held it tight while we weaved through the crowd. I didn't realise I was doing this, until he turned around and told me I didn't really have to hold his hand. I longed for the ground to swallow me up. It didn't. He did, however, say, "Well there's obviously no harm in you - have a good night" and let me stay. So it's not all bad.

For my finale, I'll stick to my most awkward and embarrassing one. Please don't read in the presence of children or before 9pm.

Last Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) I stayed at my aunt's house and slept on my cousin's floor. The next morning, with a head heavy with hangover, I woke to the sound of my cousin complaining about the aftermath of her drinking adventures the night before. All of a sudden, my stomach lurched. I was going to be sick. I knew it. I could feel it. I was hot and uncomfortable and on the verge of vomiting all over her bedroom, so I jumped up and went to run for the door. If only I'd been in less of a rush. You see, I'd taken my jeans off and well...erm...the fly of my boxers was open and I basically flashed my cousin. We're not that close for something like this to happen and not be mentioned. I was humiliated, but nonetheless ran to the toilet to be sick anyway.

This is the most awkward moment I can recall at the moment. I mean how do you have breakfast with your cousin and extended family after accidentally baring all? I will not hear the end of this. Not for the rest of my life.

I'm not a pervert, honest (and if that sign-off isn't awkard, I don't know what is). Lauren, take the limelight away from me - I'm ashamed.

I'll Leave You Alone Forever Now

Hey...so...would you guys, you know...loyal followers...want to, I dunno...have coffee with me sometime? Um, yeah...you don't have to. I understand if you don't. Urgh, you know what, forget that I asked. I'm so dumb. You wouldn't want to...

Okay, I'll leave you alone forever now.

IT'S AWKWARD MOMENTS WEEK ON THE TRANSATLANTIC SUPPORT GROUP!

We've all had these moments, and unfortunately mine have mostly come from awkward encounters with boys and men. When it comes to liking someone who you aren't 100% sure about it can be hard to break the ice and ask them out. I've been on both sides of the awkward fence.

I'll give you two examples. One where I was awkwardly asked out, and one where I awkwardly tried to ask someone out. Both were, um, really embarrassingly pathetic. 

EXAMPLE A: Nerdy mall security guard is nice enough to talk to, but 18-year-old jewellery kiosk employee really wants the guy who works at the record store.

One evening kiosk employee forgets something in the mall, and has to return at close. Nerdy is there, and is quite awkward when he approaches her to tell her he thinks she's really great, and interesting, and nice to talk to...blah blah blah...and asks her to go out with him sometime.

Kiosk girl wants to say no, but doesn't want feelings to be hurt, since she knows she'll see Nerdy often. So she says, "I'll think about it, okay?" and leaves.

Next shift where they're both working, Nerdy approaches,"So, have you thought about it?" Kiosk girl feels awful, but has to let him down easy.

Now, that is awkward!

EXAMPLE B: Kiosk girl is now a Barista at a cafe and her favourite customer (at the time) is a animator who sits in her store and draws for hours with his medium coffee, in a mug.

[Sidenote: You may remember him as Cartoon Boy from the relationships post.]

Cartoon Boy is older, but is back in school to study animation. His dream is to work for Disney! He is very chatty and very friendly, and was extremely sympathetic to the Barista when she was laid off from her "real job" as an editorial assistant. 

During his reading week (a week off for college/university students) he comes in, and the Barista's hands get shaky. She tries to use his week off as an excuse to hangout with him outside of work.

"Um, so yeah, if you're free this week....let me know...if you want to get coffee or something."

This awkward statement is misunderstood as an invitation to come back to the cafe for coffee.

He leaves and nothing comes of it. He then moves away to Sudbury, Ontario.

Damn, that's awkward.

Anyways, it's also extremely uncomfortable to run into people from high school. It happens to me a lot because I live in the city where I went to high school. At the mall, at work, at the bar, at social gatherings, you name it - they will find you and remind you that you're a failure! Sometimes you just don't want to deal with it, so here are three ways to avoid talking to these people:

1. Pretend you're on the phone.

2. Hide behind a book or magazine.

3. Fashion a clever disguise.

I hope this post didn't make you feel too awkward.

Hey, Tom? Do you want to maybe, I dunno, write a post about...you know, awkward moments? It's okay if you don't want to, I totally understand.

But if you do, would you be able to post it on Wednesday? I totally get it if you're busy and don't want to or think this is dumb. God, I'm such an idiot...

Anyways, I'll see you Wednesday Tom! 

Great post last week Lauren, I want some nachos now!

F%#k it, I'm Just Going to Get a Bunch of Cats

This week The Transatlantic Support Group is discussing “Relationships or Lack Thereof.” Though I try to be all feminist and think “I am fine alone, I don’t need a man,” it’s hard sometimes - especially now that we’re in our twenties and our friends are pairing off, getting married and having babies, buying houses and stuff. There’s so much pressure on us! Have a career, settle down, have your own life. But it’s scary and hard and I don’t want to!

Ahhh!

Okay, so I keep a lot of notebooks and journals and I never throw them out or even tear out pages. Because of this I can tell you that in May 2009 I came up with the four guys who’ve captivated my heart and made me crazy, and I of course gave them hilarious nicknames. It’s been over a year since then, but I’d say the list still stands.

Before I share these with you, I must add that I suck at relationships. Seriously. Don’t ever ask me for advice because I am a lost cause. I choose horrible and/or unavailable people who turn me into a crazy person. That said, I’m going to try to present these as light-heartedly as possible, but in some cases it will be hard to hide the pain/anger/sadness.

Also, back in 2009 I made this graphic featuring South Park characters for each of them, because I thought I might write about them on My Quarter-Life Crisis, but I got nervous and never did. I didn’t want them to accidently (or purposely) stumble upon my blog.

Okay...here we go...

1. Bi-Polar - He’s my number one heartbreak story of all time, with a bullet. We met in high school, he was 17, I was 16. He wore a cute hat and played guitar. We became friends, sort of. We talked on the phone a lot and I always felt like I was close to getting somewhere with him, but he always said nice things, then retracted. Invited me out, then cancelled. This went on for three years. When I started university we didn’t speak for almost four years and I stupidly let him back into my life - because I thought it would be different than before. It wasn’t. Only we were adults and nothing hurts more than being 24-years-old and falling for the same old shit you fell for when you were 17. I’ve slipped up a few times since we last ended things (for the second time). Sorry this wasn’t that funny, I just can’t really think of anything funny to say about this. He played me hot and cold for four and half years combined. This has taught me that drunken emails are a bad idea and you should leave the past in the past.

Listen to: Us Remains Impossible by Matthew Good

2. Baby Daddy - For a more lighthearted story, meet Baby Daddy. When I was 17 I got my first real job at a kiosk in the mall, and he worked at my favourite record store. He was older, smoked (not that that’s cool), and had crazy hair. He used to talk to me all the time on his breaks. He was 22 at the time. Over the years our paths would cross and I always thought he was so adorable and funny and crazy - but I knew I was just a silly high school girl. Later on, during one of my summer’s home from university, our path’s would cross again. In a dirty basement bar he told me how he always liked me and asked me why we never made out. This caught me off guard because It had never occurred to me that he liked me too. So awkwardly, in front of my friend (sorry Amanda) he tried to kiss me. I was pretty much paralyzed by fear and shock. Anyways, after seven gin and tonics I feeling pretty good about that situation, so I gave him my number and he promised to call. I waited. And waited...and waited some more. He never called. Now he has a wife and a baby.

Listen to: Kiss by Prince

3. The Cowardly Manwhore - Never, ever start up a naughty text relationship with one of your friends. Cowardly and I got caught up in a virtual mess that never actually led to anything meaningful and ended with him “dumping” me VIA text telling me he now had a girlfriend! It was so humiliating. I was so hurt by this that I asked him to please talk to me in person. Instead of doing that he avoided me for three and a half years. Also, I should mention that he and I went out several times on what felt like legitimate dates. The good news is that we’re finally speaking again, so that’s good - but we no longer have each other’s cell numbers. [You guys are forcing me to reveal embarrassing stories, jeez].

Listen to: 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover by Paul Simon

4. Hey! Jude - Hey! Jude knows I exist, but he doesn’t know that in my mind he’s my boyfriend and I’ve named all the dogs we’re gonna have together. He’ll play music, I’ll write and create art on the side, and we’ll just have this fantastic life on the fringe together. I’m insane. I know. Also, I have the same last name as his ex, which doesn’t bode well for me. Chances are I’ll just pine over him from afar for a bit longer until someone new captures my attention. Oh, I met him because he used to play shows with my cousin’s husband. Now, I just stalk him on Facebook and attend the occasional gig. I’ve probably revealed too much already. But if you’re reading this Hey! Jude, want to grab a cup of coffee sometime?

Listen to: Green Eyes by Coldplay

Okay, so now you know how unstable I am. Go ahead, un-follow me, I can take it. I’ve been dumped by a text message - I can handle it. Actually, I can’t...please don’t leave me!

As an added bonus, here are some honourable mentions:

The Dog Guy - a cute customer of mine at the cafe, who had an adorable dog. He and I chatted a few times, but he has since disappeared (or moved). I’m pretty sure he was a borderline alcoholic who hated women though.

Cartoon Boy - another former customer of mine. He was an animator and once he brought in a Star Wars figurine he bought on ebay to show me. He moved up north and I was sad.

The Hot T.A. - he was my T.A. for my first year writing class and he was so good looking he made me nervous. He was a former hockey player, who probably has his PhD in Social and Political Thought by now. I used to sit next to him.

Buddy Holly - he was my grade 9 crush. I used to walk by his locker and freak out because I was just a kid and he was all cool and wore Chuck Taylors and thick black glasses and played guitar. Naturally I hated his girlfriend, even though she was a perfectly nice person. In grade 10, after he was graduated, I used his old locker. It was way out of the way from most of my classes.

Mr. Clarke - Mr. Clarke was my soccer coach when I was in grade 10 (I think). He was a girl on my team’s older brother. He was so cute and I thought I was cooler than I probably was back then.

My Grade 6-8 Crush - He was the most popular boy at school, and I was the most awkward. He made it all worth while by dancing with me at the grade 8 grad dance.

So there you have it folks...now you know that I am terrible at meeting decent people and my “relationships” have all been very unstable and unhealthy.

Tom - I trust you have something witty and British to say about this topic on Wednesday. I’ll be over here, weeping into my virtual pillow.

Lauren - Thanks for the topic suggestion - I would have never had the balls to post this on my main blog. Having back up helps.

Readers - Thank you for making it to the end of this post! I don’t think I ever thought to ask this, but if you guys have any ideas for topics, please share them in the comments. We have made a list ourselves, but feedback and suggestions would be fabulous!

Caught In a Landslide, No Escape from Reality.

This week The TASG tackles the expansive topic of “Real Life VS. Blog Life.” I actually got this idea from a friend - a friend in “Real Life” who reads my blog. She’s one of the chosen few I’ve allowed to cross over into this world. She wanted to know more about how one might keep up with a real life while also carrying on an online identity.

While I don’t blog anonymously, I do, however, keep my blogging life to myself and only let a select few in my real life know about it. I guess I do this because I am sorta, kinda embarrassed about it. I feel like I’m SO into my blog that some people in my real life might be freaked out by my dedication. It still feels like a nerdy hobby to me, and only other bloggers understand.

What’s funny is that for nearly a year I blogged with just a few real friends reading it. I was actually afraid to join 20-Something Bloggers, the social networking site, because I was afraid of what strangers would think if they read it. I was afraid of mean internet HATERZ! But guess what? Without that site I wouldn’t have “met” Lauren and Tom and this site would not exist. I’m so fickle, I know.

Basically I love my little Quarter-Life Crisis posse and I wish I could visit each and every one of you.

That said, I have never online dated or anything, so I don’t have much experience in meeting online friends in real life. I do have one story for you that I was thinking about while I was in the shower the other day (a great thinking place, by the way).

I still have my MySpace account. I haven't updated
it in years - hence my youthful face - unhardened
by life. I was "complacent" when I last updated.

Back before Facebook I used MySpace - as so many of us did. The thing about MySpace was that anyone would and could add you - not just your friends and acquaintances. I was in Second Year at York University in North York (Toronto) and lived on campus. A guy named Chad added me to MySpace and he lived in Toronto, closer to Downtown, but he went to a Technical Institute type college near York and also had a radio show on the York Glendon (our other campus) station. He would catch the free Glendon shuttle bus at York’s main campus. After adding him to MSN Messenger he asked if I wanted to meet up with him before his shuttle bus arrived one evening. I reluctantly agreed.

I had plans for later that night to watch The O.C. with my friends, so I knew it would just be a short visit. I got a tea and waited for him in the Student Centre. We met up and he got some Taco Bell or something to eat. We talked a bit, and it turned out he was from Napanee, Ontario, originally, and he laughed about how his virtually unknown town got famous because Avril LaVigne was from there. The whole conversation was awkward though - because I didn’t want him to think it was a date. I told him that I never did things like this, you know, meet people from the internet in real life. He seemed surprised, ‘cause I guess he’d met a lot of people this way.

He had to catch his shuttle, and he said he’d play some Guster for me on his show (which I didn’t get to listen to, because I was watching The O.C.). I ran back to my residence and didn’t mention the meeting to my friends. I felt awkward and embarrassed that I’d just met someone from MySpace. After that we only casually chatted and eventually each deleted each other from our virtual lives.

Anyways, that is my one example of letting my “Real Life” collide with my “Virtual Life.” But now that I’m older, I think I’d be cool with meeting a lot of you guys for real. I feel like blogging has really opened up my life to so many wonderful people who, in many ways, are just like me, even if they live across the sea or across the border.

I’m still not ready to let all my “Real” friends know about my intense blogging hobby - but maybe eventually I’ll get there. Sometimes people ask me if I’m still writing and I usually say, “yeah, not really.” It’s so stupid because I should just say, “yes, actually I have a blog, I’ll send you the link.” But no, I don’t, I just tell them I don’t write anymore and they seem disappointed.

Anyways, I could go on and on, but I think I’ll leave it because I’m sure Tom and Lauren each have interesting takes on this topic as well. I’d love to know how each of you handle your blogging hobby etc.

But I will end this with a question to readers:

How do you separate and/or combine your “Real Life” and “Blog Life”?

See ya Wednesday Major Tom!

Don't judge me! This is a photo from 4th Year University.
I'm kissing Seth Cohen while wearing a face mask.
I'm trying to up last week's embarrassing photo.
Yes, I had an O.C. poster in my room.
Again, Don't judge me!

Bonjour & Welcome!

Welcome! You may have seen comments on various blogs referencing The Transatlantic Support Group or The TASG and wondered what we were up to. Well here we are. If you read our “About Us” section you’ll know that each week on this blog two awesome bloggers, lalalalauren and TbR, and myself will be posting weekly as a way to talk about our struggles with the real world. We agreed to a weekly schedule of Monday, Wednesday, Friday. I am doing Mondays, TbR Wednesdays, and Lauren will finish off the week with Fridays.

We also agreed that we should do weekly themes - each of us writing on the same topic. This week’s topic is “Who Am I and What Am I Doing With My Life?” as a way of introducing ourselves. The three of us have separate blogs that we will continue to use - so if you follow us on those, you should probably just follow us here too. You won't regret it.

Who am I?

I’ve never really written this stuff on my main blog, but I feel like The TASG was created for stories like these, so here we go.

I’m Allison and I live in Southern Ontario, Canada - between Toronto and Niagara Falls basically. I am, at the time of writing this, 26-years-old (yikes). I have an Honours Bachelor's Degree in Professional Writing from York University in Toronto. I graduated in 2007, here is a photo of me at my convocation:

After graduation I spent four months tricking Mastercard into believing that I was a paying them, when really I was just taking money out from my credit card and then paying the minimum payment with it. This is what I call creative banking! In other words, I was unemployed. After four months of soul-crushing resume sending, I managed to get myself an unpaid internship with a local community living magazine. I was the Editorial Intern and got my name published a few times. I guess I did a good job, because in December 2007 I was hired on part-time as the Editorial Assistant - a title created for me. I had a desk, an email address, and new responsibilities. Oh, but I’ve forgotten something...back in August when I took the internship I knew I needed a paying job too. A former co-worker of mine from my high school/summer/Christmas retail job, suggested I apply at the lakeside cafe she worked at. So, I was making a bit of money while working for free at the magazine.

When I got hired at the magazine I kept the job at the cafe because the magazine job was part-time only and I needed to make some extra money and my evenings and weekends were free.

As most of you know, in 2008 the economy was beginning to go through...a rough patch. It was hard for us, a small, free publication to survive. So on February 15, the day after Valentine’s Day, I was laid off after less than three months of employment. 2008 was a long time ago, nearly three years I realize. But you have to understand that the publishing industry totally changed due to the recession. Places were downsizing, books and magazines were going online, and no one was hiring. I’ve been through many “what am I doing with my life” phases over these past few years and to be honest, it feels like a blur.

Time is not on my side.

So what am I doing with my life? I’m still working at the cafe. I have done a bit of freelance editing and proofreading, but nothing that will get me out of this rut. I took an online course and didn’t find it that useful. I apply for the occasional job, but I don’t even know what I’m good at anymore.

Why can’t my job be this? Why can’t I just get paid to write about my life. Works for David Sedaris, why not me? I guess I’m not as funny and my family isn’t nearly as wacky as his.

So there you have it folks, the sad story of me.

Oh and if you care:

I am 5’3”, I have green eyes and brown hair. I have two cats and live in the suburbs. I have a brother who is nothing like me. He is good at science and plays sports. Not that I suck at sports. I played soccer for 12 or 13 years (that’s football to you Tom) and I run on a semi-regular basis. I also love arts and crafts - painting and making things. So, I do plenty of awesome things with my life, just none that will make me any money. I love to read, also.

When I was a little kid I wanted to be an artist when I grew up. I feel like 7-year-old Allison is still holding on to that dream.

Crank up Radiohead’s “Just.”

Can’t wait to hear what you have to say on Wednesday TbR!

The Canuck!